The Message You’re Afraid to Send

REACHING OUT

People say they’re more afraid of public speaking than spiders, snakes, or drowning. That sounds dramatic… until you remember this: we’re wired for belonging.

Thousands of years ago, getting rejected by the group wasn’t awkward, it was dangerous. No tribe meant no protection. No protection meant you didn’t last long.

Fast forward to today.

You’re not getting kicked out of the village. You’re sending a text. Or an email. Or checking in on a past client. And yet your brain still panics.

Reaching out to an old friend.
A past client you “meant” to follow up with.
A great prospect you haven’t talked to in a while.
Someone you respect.

Your mind immediately jumps to worst-case scenarios.

“They’ll be annoyed.”
“They’ll think I’m salesy.”
“They’ll ignore me.”
“They’ll judge me.”

As if one unanswered text is going to send your entire life into a tailspin.

So pause for a second and actually sit with the fear.

What’s the real worst-case outcome?
Is a past client truly going to be mad you checked in?

If a prospect says no, is that catastrophic or just clarity?
Does silence hurt… or does it simply mean “not right now”?

In most cases, the worst thing that happens is nothing.
A polite no. Or no response at all.

Neither one ends your career.

Here’s the part nobody talks about: Everyone feels this.

That little knot in your stomach before hitting send.
The urge to overthink the wording.
The temptation to delete the draft and “do it later.”

Most people give in to it.

They don’t send the message.
They don’t make the ask.
They don’t follow up, which is precisely why this matters.

If you can push through that moment and hit send, you’re already ahead.

Not because you’re smarter.
Because you’re willing to act when others freeze.

Their fear becomes your advantage.

So here’s your move:

Think about the outreach you’ve been avoiding.

The check-in you keep postponing.
The invite you never sent.
The introduction you didn’t ask for.
The message sitting in drafts… or only in your head.

Ask yourself one simple question:

If this turns into a “yes,” is it worth the risk of a “no”?

Almost every time, the answer is yes.

Most people won’t act on that.

But you will. 👏